WHY LORD OF THE RINGS IS OVER-RATED AND INFERIOR TO STAR WARS - A Bullet Point Commentary
I’m sick and tired of hearing about all the critical and commercial success the Lord of the Rings trilogy has enjoyed. It’s over-rated people! Why am I the only one who sees this? The original Star Wars trilogy is far superior, and here’s why.
* Star Wars is full of fun, classic, archetypal characters. Except for Gollum, Lord of the Rings is full of boring, stereotypical, inconsequential characters.
* Star Wars is clear, precise, and simple, which makes for great mythology. Lord of the Rings is convoluted and tedious, which makes for great boredom.
* Star Wars is post-modern. Lord of the Rings is medieval; – i.e. Star Wars is old and new at the same time. Lord of the Rings is just old.
* Star Wars is brilliant escapism: when I watch Star Wars, I feel like I’ve escaped my reality and visited other worlds. When I watch Lord of the Rings I feel like I’ve visited New Zealand.
* Star Wars is intensely engaging. As for Lord of the Rings, I’ve fallen asleep at all three films, which is no easy task considering I’m an insomniac.
* Star Wars was conceived and made for film. Lord of the Rings was conceived for literature and doesn’t translate well to film.
* Star Wars is about spirituality and mysticism versus technology, a relevant theme for our time. Lord of the Rings is about jewelry. (That may sound glib, but it’s really not that far from the truth. Sure it’s about good versus evil, but making a ring the focus of that struggle is really kind of lame - no matter what the ring symbolizes).
* Star Wars has great villains, great personifications of evil, which is a key factor in making classic mythology. Again, except for Gollum, there are no good villains in Lord of the Rings and the main villain is far too nebulous, which is not a good fit for mythology.
* The action in Star Wars is brilliantly choreographed and flows naturally from the story. The action in Lord of the Rings is far too busy, redundant and superfluous.
* Star Wars is full of fun, classic, archetypal characters. Except for Gollum, Lord of the Rings is full of boring, stereotypical, inconsequential characters.
* Star Wars is clear, precise, and simple, which makes for great mythology. Lord of the Rings is convoluted and tedious, which makes for great boredom.
* Star Wars is post-modern. Lord of the Rings is medieval; – i.e. Star Wars is old and new at the same time. Lord of the Rings is just old.
* Star Wars is brilliant escapism: when I watch Star Wars, I feel like I’ve escaped my reality and visited other worlds. When I watch Lord of the Rings I feel like I’ve visited New Zealand.
* Star Wars is intensely engaging. As for Lord of the Rings, I’ve fallen asleep at all three films, which is no easy task considering I’m an insomniac.
* Star Wars was conceived and made for film. Lord of the Rings was conceived for literature and doesn’t translate well to film.
* Star Wars is about spirituality and mysticism versus technology, a relevant theme for our time. Lord of the Rings is about jewelry. (That may sound glib, but it’s really not that far from the truth. Sure it’s about good versus evil, but making a ring the focus of that struggle is really kind of lame - no matter what the ring symbolizes).
* Star Wars has great villains, great personifications of evil, which is a key factor in making classic mythology. Again, except for Gollum, there are no good villains in Lord of the Rings and the main villain is far too nebulous, which is not a good fit for mythology.
* The action in Star Wars is brilliantly choreographed and flows naturally from the story. The action in Lord of the Rings is far too busy, redundant and superfluous.
The bottomline: Star Wars is the greatest fantasy ever conceived for film, one that is difficult to match and almost impossible to best. Lord of the Rings may be great literature, but great literature doesn't always result in great cinema.
Rating on the Rickter-Scale:
STAR WARS: A New Hope (10) The Empire Strikes Back (10) Return of the Jedi (9)
LORD OF THE RINGS: The Fellowship of the Ring (5) The Two Towers (5.5) The Return of the King (7.5)
P.S. Incredibly, they have found a way to make Lord of the Rings even more boring. As of February 2006, Lord of the Rings will also be a broadway musical. Give me a break!!!
THE RICKTER-SCALE:
10 (A+) – extraordinary, a masterpiece
9.5/9.0 (A) – exceptional, a milestone
8.5/8.0 (A-) – excellent, a classic
7.5/7.0 (B+) – very good, a near classic
6.5/6.0 (B) – good
5.5/5.0 (B-) – fair
4.5/4.0 (C+) – poor
3.5/3.0 (C) – very poor, a near disaster
2.5/2.0 (C-) – terrible, a total disaster
1.5/1.0 (D+) – torture, a catastrophe
0.5/0.0 (F) – abysmal, the end of film as an art form
10 (A+) – extraordinary, a masterpiece
9.5/9.0 (A) – exceptional, a milestone
8.5/8.0 (A-) – excellent, a classic
7.5/7.0 (B+) – very good, a near classic
6.5/6.0 (B) – good
5.5/5.0 (B-) – fair
4.5/4.0 (C+) – poor
3.5/3.0 (C) – very poor, a near disaster
2.5/2.0 (C-) – terrible, a total disaster
1.5/1.0 (D+) – torture, a catastrophe
0.5/0.0 (F) – abysmal, the end of film as an art form
posted by Rix Flix at 1:33 AM
6 Comments:
Well uuhh, I have to say I agree.
Oh Snap!
ecc 7:20
this isn't spam it's graffiti
Why is it that everyone thinks their own opinions about the artistic value of something add up to fact? Art is subjective. If you don't like something it doesn't mean anything except that you don't like it. Vice-versa if you like it. I guess you could make the argument that the more people like something the more it's total subjective value to the community is. That said, just because "the herd" likes something doesn't mean much either if you think you have refined tastes. All in all, this type of bashing is just lame as it shows the ignorance of the person making outrageous claims of fact about something that is inherently very personal and subjective.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Who said anything about fact? Obviously I was expressing an opinion.
William, you're a huge nerd- that's a fact.
Waa! Waa! Somebody didn't like your precious hobbits. Get a life.
I guess LOTR is above criticism? When somebody doesn't like your favorite nerd movie, that invalidates the entire endeavour film criticism altogether? Common dude- over reacting just a little?
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